Sunday, January 14, 2018

Earlene Duvall A Special Lady

Once in a while I get the urge to find someone from my past that I have not been in touch with in some time.  Sometimes it is a strong pull to find them, sometimes just a thought that shows up many times within a few days.  Most often than not, I find that they have passed away.  Such is the doorway for this blog entry.   I have traveled many places playing music, roughly 30 years of my life. Along the way I have met many wonderful individuals.  Some of those people stick in your mind the rest of your life.  This lady was one of those.   I met her in the fall of 1989 in the middle of Montana.   We played a little hole in the wall place there with a mixture of types of people.  Earlene was one of those people.   She sat by herself which is one of the reasons I went over to her table on my break.  Not because I felt sorry for a loner lol… no no.  She was dancing whenever she was asked, she pretty much knew everyone there, it was not loneliness that drew me to her, it was her smile.  She was soft spoken, very much a lady who was not afraid to laugh.  First impression was she was a true lady.  Educated, clever, soft spoken, wise, kind & very interested in the arts of any kind.  We got to talking, she loved the band.  She loved music & most of all loved to dance.  She would come out at least once a week if not more, not on a weekend so much but the middle of the week when it was less crowded. I knew she was a little older than myself, but age was never something we talked about, she laughed when it came up actually.  She always said.. I’m OLDER than you, but no number came out with that statement.  It was a mute point.  We knew she had lived a rich life up to the point where we entered it.   She asked me if we would like to come out to her little cabin the next day so we could experience the mountains of Montana first hand instead of looking out the window.  We said yes, made that date & showed up the next day. 
She lived in the Judith Mountains around Lewistown.  It was a little bit of a drive & the closer you got to her place the more you drove back in time, more of a feeling than a reality.
She lived by herself in a cabin she had built. As I recall it was sort of an A frame cabin with a big porch.  Very charming with no phone, no cable, no modern day intrusions.  Oh she had indoor plumbing and electricity but that was about all for modern creature comfort luxury.
It was a two story’s.  The minute you walked in it smelled of cookies & books.  The main floor had the kitchen & a small seating space.  A spiral stairs was just to the left of the front door that lead up to the second floor.   There were two main rooms up there, the first as you came up the stairs had books lining the walls like a library.  That was the decore plus the baby grand in the middle of the room.  The room was not very large so the piano was very dominant… piano & books.   Her bedroom was towards the back of the house on that upper floor.  The view was spectacular thru the windows.  She spend many hours there playing her piano, reading with no distractions.  I do not ever think she tired of this.  It was a quiet time in her life.   She had already been a wife, mother, sibling, business woman etc etc.  That was all past except for the mother part, you never stop being that.   Mind you that age thing again, she looked like maybe MAYBE 10 years older than me at the time.  I did the math only to find out she was 57 years when I met her, I was 28.   She did not look her age by a long shot!  She still had dreams that not only would she dream, but she would accomplish before long.  She wanted to share her little paradise with interesting people & bring her adult children into a business that she wanted to share with them.   She wanted to turn her little cabin into a bed & breakfast.   She not only did that… but her family did come be apart of it. I have no idea of the status now with the family, I did not know them personally only thru their mother.  She wanted it to be something she could leave to them, her children & grand children.    She did it!  It was called the Duvall Inn, she built on and made it bigger, beautiful & a perfect getaway.  People came from all over the world. She had made that dream she shared with us, come true.  
     We saw her over the next decade since our first meeting time & time again.  She would dance, we would go out to her house for dinner with band members that changed over & over thru the years.  There is way more to the story here however I shall keep it private for the lady.  I do not know if he ever shared some things with her family.  Perhaps she shared things with her daughter, perhaps not.  I will say, with respect to the lady who we grew to know & love, that she never stopped loving, she never stopped thinking smart. She never let her heart get in the way of what she thought was right & she never stopped being kind, even if it meant her heart was gonna have a scar that was not visible. I believe that there was way more to her than any of us knew.   She was a special woman to me/us.  She lived a very full life with many chapters in it, just like her beloved books.  
     The last time I talked to her, I had found her after a long time of no contact.  I found a way to contact her (that was never easy).   We got on the phone,  I had a reason to call other than catching up.  One of my band members had passed away & they had been close.   She said she sort of knew already… she felt it.   There  been no contact there for years, yet… she felt it.  We caught up on many things, laughed a bit, remembered things together shared a few more precious moments.    She told me about the Inn, & all the changes that had happened since we were last there.  She told me she was still working there & enjoying it but it was getting to the point where she was more tired than she used to be at the end of the day.   I asked her if there was anyone in her life romantically after all this time… she laughed and said… well there is this one gentleman from Europe who had been a guest several times that had asked her to go on a trip with him.  I said..”well are you gonna?? Why not? Sounds wonderful”…  she laughed harder & said.. Carrie, I am 79 years old…    This was the first time I had known the exact number of her age…  it dumbfounded me.  She was not just 10 years old than me lol… she was almost 30 years my senior.   She never showed it.  It was not because she acted like a kid, not at all.   She hid her age without trying because she was always…  a lady.   She didn’t act like a lady, she was one.  No age for class & elegance.
    I had been thinking about my old friend off and on… that pull again.  I dreaded it but I went to the search engines & typed in her name with the obit at the end of it.  Sure enough, there it was in front of me.    The lady had passed away in July of 2017.   She lived to be 85 years old.  I know, her life was full.  I am sad at the news yet happy for her in so many ways.  So blessed to have known her, there was none quite like her.  She was unique, special & will always have a place in my thoughts & heart.   Earlene, we love you.  Rest in Peace my lovely lady friend. 

Her Obit from her daughter.


Earlene Ann Duvall passed away on July 3, 2017 in Lewistown, Montana.
She was born to Earl and Sylvia Duvall on Oct. 19, 1932 in Geraldine, where she was raised along with her siblings on the family farm.
Mom attended high school with the Geraldine class of 1950. She loved to share stories about the fun she had playing basketball with her teammates.
Earlene married Howard Ludeman on Oct. 28, 1949. They raised their family while farming and ranching in Graceville, Montana. Earlene was a loving daughter, sister, wife, mother, grandmother and aunt.
Mom had a passion for the great outdoors, especially riding horseback with her family in the Missouri River Breaks. She also enjoyed card games (pinochle was a favorite), dancing the waltz and jitterbug, teaching Sunday school and singing as a member of the Geraldine Methodist Church choir.
We have fond memories of mom’s incredible voice as she sang and played the piano most evenings, after a long hard day of work on the ranch. Eating mom’s home cooked meals was a delight to many who “happened” to drop in around meal times. Her maple bars were second to none.
Mom’s dedicated volunteer works included Hospice, the Performing Arts Center, Wesley Center and caring for foster children, to name a few.
Mom lived just outside of Lewistown, up Lime Kiln Canyon, for over 40 years. She loved to hike in the Judith Mountains and built a home there, and eventually built the Duvall Inn. It was a way of life she loved to share with others.
Earlene was preceded in death by her parents, infant sister Carol, sister Betty McManaman, brother Earl, sister-in-law Kay Duvall and great-grandson Austin Michael.
She is survived by her children Randy (Sandi) Ludeman of Geraldine; Darcy (Curt) Black of St. Charles, Missouri; Darla (John) Goleash; four grandchildren and eight great-grandchildren; brothers Joe Ed (Nita) Duvall and Lenny (Kay) Duvall; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and friends.